Archive for April, 2010

Craydawgs Visit White House

April 28, 2010

WASHINGTON — The 2009 BEML Champions the Craydawgs made a visit to the White House earlier today to meet with President Obama. Craydawgs ownership made a special point to apologize to the White House staff on behalf of the BEML for the boorish behavior displayed by the ’08 Barracudas, and in particular, the clogged Oval Office toilet left behind by C.C. Sabathia.

The Craydawgs present a Dawgs jersey to a third president.

Week 3 Report: The Dirty Dog Strut

April 27, 2010

The Dirty Dogs did some dirty work in Week 3, stepping over Seymour Gardens en route to 1st place, 61 to 59.5. In the process, the DDs led the BEML in ERA (1.23) and Saves (8) and now lead the league in those categories. Recognizing the relative weakness of their offense, the Dogs worked a deal to send disappointing ace Jon Lester (6.23 ERA, 0 Wins) to the Craydawgs in return for the offensive firepower of Kendry Morales, who debuted for the Dogs by going 3-for-3 with a HR (6) and 3 BI (16).

Owner/Manager Manusama does the “Dirty Dog Strut.”

Seymour Gardens fell 8 points by hitting only 6 HRs in Week 3…Don’t blame Ryan Braun (.366/5/20/4 on the year)…Look out for the George Kents, who gained 7 points and are just 4.5 points off the lead after picking up 5 points in Steals this week…the GKs swiped 15 bags to lead the league, and Michael Bourn had 7 of them (8)…the Bears picked up 4 points and are just 8 off the lead now…Los Osos led the league in HRs (15) and RBI (60) in addition to WHIP (1.08)…Mark Reynolds was en feu for the Bears, hitting .421/3/11/1 on the week…the 5th place Craydawgs tied Project Mayhem for the lead this week in Wins (6), including two from Jorge De La Rosa (2), but had to send Jorge to the DL together with OF Nelson Cruz (5 SBs in Week 3), where they will join Catchers Miguel Montero and Kelly Shoppach, SS Jimmy Rollins, and OF Jacoby Ellsbury…the Snowmen (10.5 points back) tied the Bears for the Week 3 HR lead (15), including 4 HRs from the perenially undervalued Paul Konerko (6)…Don’t look now but first-year franchise Project Mayhem is definitely in the mix (12.5 points back) after picking up 5.5 points in Week 3…the Mayhem led the BEML with a .303 BA and 53 runs this week as SS Ryan Theriot went 14-for-28 with 6 BI; he’s at .329/0/10/5 on the year…

Scuba divers are poking at the listless Barracudas and wondering if they are dead…the Fish are swimming listlessly at the bottom of the ocean after a uniformly bad Week 3 performance (-13 points)…the Cudas trailed the league in BA (.236), HRs (6), and ERA (4.50)…”Tragic,” said Cudas Skipper Mike Markoski…Dan Haren (10.50 ERA/1.83 WHIP this week) and closer Chad Qualls (9.82/1.64) stunk it up in uncharacteristic fashion, and the BEML’s highest paid performer Hanley Ramirez struggled mightily (4-for-22 with 1 BI)…

The Wolfpack continues to hibernate after three weeks, though Jose Reyes may be starting to come alive (.391 with 3 steals in Week 3), and Ted Lilly came back from his injury with great fanfare (6 IP, 0 ER, W).

Trade Action

April 25, 2010

Seymour Gardens worked a trade recently to acquire aging third baseman Chipper Jones, swapping aging closer Billy Wagner to the Snowmen; the trade filled holes for each side.

Meanwhile, and not to be outdone by April rival Gardens, the Dirty Dogs sent a missive to the league that they were seeking raw power. The Craydawgs delivered, sending 1B Kendry Morales (along with SP Brett Myers) in return for SP Jon Lester (along with Kerry Wood). Kendry endeared himself to the rest of the Dirty Dogs by hitting a three-run homer in his first game for the Filthy Ones.

Did you know? Kendry Morales escaped from Cuba. His dream of playing in the BEML, and in particular, the Dirty Dogs, has since been realized.

Maddux to be Inducted into BEML HOF

April 19, 2010

EAST MEADOW–The BEMLWA announced today that Greg Maddux (1993-2008) has been officially named to the Big East Meadow League Hall of Fame after receiving the requisite number of votes from BEML league members. Maddux will enter the Hall as a Craydawg. The induction ceremony will take place later this year at the Public Library here.

The Official BEML Hall of Fame Portrait of Maddux as it will hang in the East Meadow Public Library.

Week 2 Report: Gardens Plant a Seed of Doubt in Minds of Competition

April 19, 2010

Seymour Gardens at Schwab Park exit Week 2 with a nine-point lead over the Dirty Dogs and Barracudas, 67.5 to 58.5. SG@SP relied on formidable pitching from aces Adam Wainwright (2 Ws, 1.06 ERA, 16 Ks in Week 2) and Matt Garza (2 Ws, 0.56 ERA, 10 Ks), posting a BEML-leading 2.29 ERA and 6 wins. SG@SP also hit a league-high .315 led by Ryan Braun’s 11-for-26 (.423) performance.

The aforementioned seed of doubt.

Elsewhere in the BEML…The Dirty Dogs led the league in Runs (55) and Steals (12)…the Cudas led in RBI (58) and had a huge output from the stylishly-named Shin-Soo Choo (.579/3/11/1)…the Snowmen have cooled off a bit (-8 points) but had a nice week from Derek Jeter (.500/3/7/0)…the George Kents had five HRs from Chase Utley (.341/6/12 on the season) but have suffered unexpectedly lousy pitching from Wandy Rodriguez (0-2, 6.10 ERA) and Trevor Hoffman (12.60) so far this year…the Bears hit just .231 this week as their young cubs Colby Rasmus (1-for-15) and Matt Wieters (3-for-23) struggled; Roy Halladay has been unstoppable so far, however (3 Ws, 1.12 ERA, 21 Ks in 24 IP)…the Craydawgs rocked a league-leading 19 homers, including four from Matt Kemp (5), but were hammered on the mound (5.68 ERA/1.55 WHIP this week)…Project Mayhem rookie Jason Heyward hit .316 with 7 BI in Week 2; he’s at .302/3/15 on the season…the Wolfpack‘s offense has been miserable and is last in all hitting categories; Bengie Molina has held his own (.406 on the year), but Grady Sizemore (.231, 0 HR), Jason Bay (.217, 0 HR), Prince Fielder (.244, 0 HR), Raul Ibanez (.170, 0 HR), and David Ortiz (.171, 0 HR) have all gotten off to horrid starts.

Talkin’ ’bout Mayhem rook Heyward…

Not Haywood.

Dirty Dogs Take 1st Place Bone Away From Seymour

April 18, 2010

The Dirty Dogs jumped ahead of Seymour Gardens yesterday with a big hand from Ubaldo Jimenez, who pitched a no-hitter (6 BBs, 7 Ks). The Dogs added three HRs and 17-for-49 hitting (.347), and lead the league in Ks, Saves, and Steals.

Good luck getting the 1st place bone away from the Dirty Ones. They are filthy.

Maddux First Nominee For BEML Hall of Fame

April 17, 2010

EAST MEADOW–The BEML Writers Association (BEMLWA) has announced the foundation of the Big East Meadow League Hall of Fame, to be housed in the East Meadow Public Library.

The East Meadow Public Library, home of the BEML Hall of Fame.

The inaugural nominee is your friend and mine, Greg Maddux, namesake of the eponymous Greg Maddux Award given annually to the best pitcher in the BEML. Maddux enjoyed a phenomenal career in the BEML, winning the Maddux Award in each of the League’s first three seasons. He also won three championships: two with the ’95 and ’00 Craydawgs, and one with the ’01 Team Phil Chu squad. Finally, he is the only pitcher to win the Bonds MVP Award (1995).

Year Team Sal. W IP H+BB ER ERA WHIP
1993 Craydawgs 20 267.0 280 70 2.36 1.05
1994 Craydawgs 16 202.0 181 35 1.56 0.90
1995 Craydawgs* 19 209.7 170 38 1.63 0.81
1996 Craydawgs 6.50 15 245.0 253 74 2.72 1.03
1997 Barracudas 14 164.0 160 46 2.52 0.98
1997 Brotherhood 5 68.7 60 11 1.44 0.87
1998 Pogues 7.00 18 251.0 246 62 2.22 0.98
1999 Pogues 6.50 19 219.3 296 87 3.57 1.35
2000 Poppa’s BNB 4.75 12 156.7 179 57 3.27 1.14
2000 Craydawgs 7 92.7 89 26 2.53 0.96
2001 Bears 4.50 9 82.3 87 19 2.08 1.06
2001 Team P.C.
8 150.7 160 60 3.58 1.06
2002 Bears 4.50 16 199.3 239 58 2.62 1.20
2003 Bears 4.25 16 218.3 258 46 3.96 1.18
2004 Bears 4.25 2 42.7 59 24 5.06 1.38
2004 Bandits 14 170.0 192 71 3.76 1.13
2005 Snowmen 1.25 8 147.7 188 75 4.57 1.27
2005 Barracudas 5 77.3 87 31 3.61 1.13
2006 Pogues .25 15 210.0 256 98 4.20 1.22
2007 Barracudas .75 6 85.3 106 37 3.90 1.24
2007 Bears 8 112.7 140 54 4.31 1.24
2008 AMH .25 1 25.3 32 12 4.26 1.26
2008 Craydawgs 0 42.3 51 21 4.46 1.20
TOTALS 253 3,440.0 3,819 1,112 2.91 1.11

Bold = Championship; Italics = Maddux Award; * = MVP

Maddux enjoyed some stability early on, leading the ’93-’96 Craydawgs to some modest success including the ’95 championship. In his latter years he was tossed around like a ragdoll, most notably by the Seymour Gardens franchise (formerly known as, among other things, Brotherhood K/H, Poppa’s Brand New Bag, Team Phil Chu, Bandits, and Anthony Michael Hall), which enjoyed his talents for parts of five seasons (40 wins) but never for a full season. Seymour Gardens traded him away in 2000 and 2008, and traded for him in 1997, 2001, and 2004. Maddux also spent several seasons with the Bears (2001-04, ’07; 51 wins), Barracudas (1997, ’05, ’07; 25 wins), Pogues (1998-99, ’06; 52 wins), and Snowmen (2005; 8 wins). Ultimately Maddux was most closely associated with the Dawgs, with whom he broke into the League and with whom he enjoyed his greatest success (three Maddux Awards and two championships). Fittingly, he finished out his career in 2008 with the Dawgs, who had retired his jersey #31 in 2007. Maddux earned an unprecedented $50.00 in BEML salary in his career.

The BEML members will vote this week on whether Maddux will be elected to the Hall of Fame. Five votes are required for election.

Just look at his ’94 and ’95 seasons.

Week 1 Report: Hear Seymour Roar

April 13, 2010

Seymour Gardens threw down the gauntlet in Week 1, racing out to a six-point lead, 65-59 over the Barracudas and the Snowmen. While the Gardens did not lead a single category, they were strong and balanced in each. Curtis Granderson is on a 50/50 pace as he went .348/2 HR/4 BI/3 SB for the week. The suddenly underrated Vlad Guerrero hit .500 on the week (12-for-24). On the downside, rookie Julio Borbon went 1-for-21 and got the quick hook from Pravato, who replaced Julio with Jeff Francoeur.

Le Gauntlet des Jardins de Seymour au Parc Schwab.

Elsewhere around the BEML… the Snowmen led in BA (.322), HR (15), Runs (63) and RBI (54) but posted a league-worst 6.31 ERA/1.67 WHIP; Matt Holliday was a leader of Snowmen (.423/3/6/1)…the Barracudas surged late in the week thanks to their ace pitching staff, picking up two stellar starts from Tim Lincecum (2 Ws/17 Ks in 14 IP/1.29 ERA/0.71 WHIP)…the Craydawgs were led by Nelson Cruz (.450/4/9/0) but have already suffered injuries to OF Andre Ethier (day-to-day), C Miguel Montero (1-2 months), Jimmy Rollins, and backup catcher Kelly Shoppach…the Bears led in ERA (2.45) and got great work from Roy Halladay (2 Ws/17 Ks/0.56 ERA) that was somewhat offset by Josh Beckett’s slow start (6.17 ERA/1.80 WHIP)…the George Kents were carried by (who else) Albert Pujols (.375/4/10/0) and racked up eight wins including two from Mark Buehrle (2.40 ERA/0.93 WHIP), but suffered awful outings from Wandy Rodriguez (1.83 WHIP) and Josh Johnson (10 IP, 6.30 ERA/2.00 WHIP)…Los Dirty Dogs led in Steals (11), including four from Rajai Davis; they also tied for the lead with the Kents in Saves (6)…Project Mayhem were both anemic (.221 BA) and sluggish (3 SBs) but got a nice couple of outings out of Scott Feldman (2.57 ERA/0.93 WHIP over 14 IP)…Wolfpack struggled both at the plate (7 HRs) and on the mound (4.99 ERA) but hope that a trade with Project Mayhem for Jose Reyes will spring them out of their funk.

Early Warning: Freeze In It To Win It

April 9, 2010

With four homers and eight BI yesterday, the Snowmen served notice: they are in it to win it in 2010. Led by Miggy Cabrera (4-for-5, HR, 4 BI) and 18-for-39 (.462) hitting, the Snowmen have ensconced themselves in 2nd place.

Snowmen fan Mr. Freeze relishes his team’s hot start.

Garza Catapults Gardens Into Lead

April 8, 2010

HICKSVILLE –Matt Garza (8 IP, 1 ER, 9 Ks, W) and Adam Wainwright (7 IP, 2 ER, 6 Ks, W) delivered solid outings yesterday, helping Seymour Gardens at Schwab Park to climb into first place. Curtis Granderson added a homer and a steal. Meanwhile, the Snowmen delivered five HRs, including two from Vernon Wells (3).

Did you know? Seymour Gardens’ Matt Garza is Mexican-American.

Also Mexican-American: Breaking Bad‘s El Tortuga.